Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.

22 June 2007

I Got Your Notice Riiiiiight Here!

Last weekend I meet up with a very good friend of mine who I hadn’t seen in a long time. I also ran into Bill Shannon . It had been right about 53 weeks since I last saw his ass. He was in my wedding as one of the best men (groomsmen, but they were all best in my eyes). Since then though, dude has been ducking and dodging me like back in the day when it came to playing basketball. I mean it turned into the running joke with my wife when Bill would call or text to say he was in or on his way to Rochester and we should get together later...then I would never hear from him. I'd tell the ole lady Bill called, were gonna get a beer later and she would laugh! Well, this past Saturday was no different...expect his British ass actually showed up! Hell, he actually stayed around for a couple hours as we had a few drinks and shot the shit. He even dropped off a killer new CD he made - "Bill's Super Awesome Rap Music Mix for Summer LOL!" Its been more than a few months since I have given a decent amount of time to listening to rap music (new or old), so this CD was niiiiiiice. During the night though, we started talking about our respective blogs where he informed me that I was "on notice". WTF? On notice for what? Well, as most bloggers have, B -Shan has a list of friends and favorite blogs on the side of his blog. It seems that if you don't blog for 3 months...off you come! What a tragedy that would be right? Since I had just crossed 2 months without blogging...I was "on notice". Yeah, the guy who makes a yearly appearance with a sack full of excuses is telling me I'm on notice? For not blogging? Dude is around less than Haley's Comet and I'm on notice? And sure, the logical conclusion is that maybe he doesn't want to hang out with me. The thing is, I'm the coolest person he knows...seriously, so that's not it. So, since I'm on notice...up until I finish this blog anyway, B-40 you are on notice my friend. You've got 52 weeks to make an appearance this time!

Now, getting away from that, being on notice got me fired up to find something to blog about. What did I come up with? I decided to blog about people and things that are on notice as far as I am concerned.

Lets start with Yankee Fan . It's no secret that I'm a big
Mets Fan and have been anti-Yankee for as long as I can remember. It wasn't until a couple years ago that The Boston Green Sox and their shitty ass fans went screaming by the Yanks in terms of the amount of hatred I direct at them. I have even tried to lighten my stance against Yankee Fan. And it was working to a point. A couple good friends of mine are Yankee Fans...actual real Yankee Fans. We can talk baseball and it is an enjoyable conversation. They don't go typical Yankee Fan and become obnoxious shit talking cocksucking ill informed assholes. I never have to hear these guys talk about "yea well 26 championships bitch!" and other BS like that. A couple of weeks ago however, things started changing back to what they were. All year long the Yanks have been in the crapper while the Mets have been riding high. And of course asshole Yankee Fan would still take a run with whatever they could dig up for excuses...they were always tame. Then, shortly after the Mets took 2 of 3 from the Yanks in a weekend series the 2 teams fortunes exchanged. Since then, the Mets have been in the shit house while the Yanks are riding the wave. This is fine. As a Mets Fan its tough to watch, but its a long season and all teams will slump and have winning streaks (unless they are the Royals). This change brought out every single Yankee Honk that had been in hiding since the season started. The worst case is a dude here at work. A couple years ago he starting talking shit about the Yanks because he just saw a game and decided he had become a diehard fan overnight. Perfect. Well this cocksucker hadn't talked baseball with me all year long...until the Mets dropped 2 of 3 to the Yanks in their second meeting of the season. The past few days he has been constantly running his sewer and he is lucky that I need this job, because I would love to drop a few teeth out of his head so his smile can fit in with the rest of the bleacher bums. Yankee Fan, you are on notice. I understand that Yankee fandom is like a disease, but don't let it take over your senses. Be legit, real fans and we will all co-exist a lot better.

Next up are people asking for money. I'm not talking about friends or family, but strangers. A couple days ago I went over to Subway for lunch (save the Jared comments as well Mark). As I get out of my car, I have some dude coming up to me asking if I have a gas can. Yeah sure, I keep it in my back pocket. Not to be dismayed, this stranger then proceeds to tell me that he ran out of gas, his 47 children are in the car and can I give him a ride to the gas station (that was a stones throw away). I actually politely tell him I'm on lunch from my J-O-B, and need to get back after I grab a sammich. Now stranger guy starts to whine about "don't nobody help anybody in the city". No shit, that's why I live in the suburbs scumbag. At this point, the good Samaritan in me does want to help and he says he needs $3.64 for a gas can. How he will have money for gas after I don't know, but I reach into my wallet and notice a few $20's and a few one dollar bills. Mr. stranger guy is telling me he aint a bum and he works and has a family and he is gonna kill his 19 year old son for leaving the car on E etc. Now I'm just looking to gladly pay 3 bones to get this guy out of my hair. So, I reach in and give him 3 dollars. He said he will make up the difference then gives me like .23 cents back. Now I'm confused as he counts the dollars and says "there is only 3 here, I need $3.64". He said it with attitude which pissed me off. This fucker should be washing my windshield, offering me oral, something. I tell him I need MY MONEY to buy MY LUNCH as well. I give him his change back and say I'll give you some quarters. I go back to the car, dig out .75 cents and turn to give it to him and this fucking asshole is already crossing the street on his way back to his "family". So this mother fucker came to me needing help. I give him free of charge some of my hard earned money to which he gets an attitude because its "not enough", and then when I try to give him more he just leaves. Not even a thank you? Its too ba D this asshole didn't get hit by a car crossing the street. Best believe I would have gotten my 3 bucks back before I called 911. People asking for money...you bitches are on notice.

Hot Chick - You are on notice. It seems that after one of my last blogs, a hot chick who I was unaware that was a reader of my blog (boosting my readership up to 4), agreed with yet took some exception to my hot chick in the work place blog. Wow. I feel like Jeru The Damaja 5 minutes after a women's rights group first heard "Da Bitches". Let me clarify with my version of "Me or the Papes". Not all hot chicks are useless (eye candy aspect not withstanding). Like anyone else, they can be hard working, motivated, and stand on their own two feet. However, as mentioned in my blog, there are those that just have it made. All my examples were taken from actual events here at my job involving "hot chick". In a different situation it might be different, but in this environment (full of dudes, old bags, little if any competition), she flat out has it made. As a disclaimer, let me also add that being a hot chick doesn't mean the girlie is dumb, helpless, lazy or whatever. But you all know you feel me with what I'm saying. So hot chick, my blog isn't about all hot chicks, I'm not Guru, so don't take it personal.

Rochester Soccer is officially on notice. The great city of Rochester NY is known for many things. Its Lilacs. Its history of big business like Xerox and Kodak. Its blend of cultures. Its ability to support several different types of minor league sports franchises. It is also known for a horrible economy. For people leaving the city. For the big business like Kodak and Xerox downsizing and laying off tens of thousands of people. Along these same disappointing lines, Rochester has also been known as a Soccer hotbed. One of the only few areas in this wonderful country that can claim that designation. Luckily here in mid-2007, that designation is in jeopardy. After a struggle to get their own stadium (that included possibly tearing up part of and redesigning the wonder park the baseball Redwings play in, the Rhinos landed their own stadium. Soccer talk in Rochester was at an all time high! Now, fast forward a couple years and Soccer is on the ropes in this great city. If you have read my past blogs on the Rhinos, you know what I think of their stadium. It looks like the Green Giant took a big green and yellow aluminum shit in the middle of one of Rochester's hoods. The seats suck, the concessions suck, the amenities suck, the employees of the stadium suck, the field sucks, everything sucks. The Rhinos have gone from having 13,000 people packed into Frontier Field, to having 4,000 fans in their very own Soccer Specific stadium. Over the past weekend, the Redwings had attendance of 36,000 for a 3 game series. The Rhino's game landed them the above mentioned 4,000 fans. Many people say the reason that Soccer is now struggling is because it is not being promoted the way it was. It seems as if the team thought the new stadium would keep the fans coming...guess not. Hopefully the Rhino's and Soccer go away. They can sell their stadium to Coca Cola and the stadium can really give back to the community as we all slam pop out of the millions of 12 oz. cans we can get out of that thing. Soccer is down in Rochester and I've already started my 10 count.

Cleveland is on notice. Now that the NBA season is finally over, lets talk about LeBron and the Cavaliers. See, before the NBA Finals started, Cleveland fan was everywhere. Talking up their team, their town, their star players etc. Look, I understand Cleveland has a complex. Its one of the most cracked on major cities in America. I understand C-Town resident is bitter because guys like me never let them forget that they managed to set their river on fire...and after watching a show on the history channel, they have managed to do that several times! See here in Rochester we use water to put out fires...not to start them, but that's a whole different blog right there. Since the opening tip-off of the NBA Finals, I haven't heard a peep out of C-Town Fan. Look, your team got rolled, but you can still support them in public. You can still give the Spurs credit for the games they played. You can not go into hiding like a lost little girl after your team tanks. Its fans like this that give teams/cities a bad reputation. And lets face it, Cleveland can't afford any of that. As the baseball season trucks on, and your baseball team is looking good you should prepare yourself for the inevitable C-Town. The Steamers are going to tank as well. It's just the C-Town way.

Sopranos detractors, you are on notice! We are now a couple weeks past the Series Finale of perhaps the greatest television drama ever - The Sopranos. While Seasons 5 and both parts of 6 were nowhere near the quality of the first 4 seasons, they both lived in their own right and had their own style to them. As we all know, the series ended with everyone's heart racing as impending doom was knocking on Tony's door - then black. At first, I was pissed with this ending, but after thinking about it I was okay with it. First and foremost, there was no ending that would have made any majority happy. I myself did not want T to get killed...or even end up in jail. Some people wanted him dead. Others wanted him locked up. I'm more of a go out blazin' shoot'em up type and was at first disappointed there was really none of that in the final episode. Even Phil's death was somewhat lackluster...until I think about how most Mafia hits are...then it was perfect. The end, while technically leaving things unresolved (which I usually hate *see "Sideways"), I was alright this time. It allowed each viewer who has the slightest bit of imagination end the show in their own mind. Brilliant. Many say the answers as to what really happened are there. The fact Tony and Bobby were talking about dying and Bacala says everything probably just goes black...like the way the show ended. Maybe, but I don't think Tony died. If he did...who did it? The black dudes that came in? If so why? The war was over, Phil was dead, business was to be done. The most notable suspect was the dude in the members only jacket. Again, why would he want to kill Tony? Who would have hired him? This would touch off way too many additional plot lines/questions and would not be a good way to end the show. If they are setting up a movie, I could see it, but with Tony dead and Sil a vegetable...not much there to build off of. One thing I think could be a good possibility is that the final few moments we were seeing life the way Tony does. Nervous that everyone is trying to get him or is a would be assassin etc. I think Meadow's parking issues were just something to throw us off. Either way, we'll never know. Don Cialini's alternate ending would be something like this. Meadow would be having her parking issues. The members only coat guy would be doing his thing as everyone else would be. The Members only coat guy would walk to the bathroom get to the door then turn back towards Tony. As Meadow walks in, she sees the coat dude pull a gun and screams. We see Tony's face fall down basically as fear and panic rush over him. Then we see the coat guy through T's eyes first the screen shrunk then to full size as his eyes widen. There we have a perfect view of the would be killer about to pull the trigger when we hear a shot and see the guys side of his face explode as a bullet flies out of the left side of his head. Then the camera pans to see a nervous yet unshaken A.J. holding a gun fresh off saving his fathers life. Then we here a quote from Paulie right after Christopher became made. "And so it goes this thing of ours." Done. My reasoning would be that somewhere in-between A.J.'s suicide attempt, his stint in the nuthouse, the Mafia war he was caught up in as well as the fact his father was still trying to help him out (with the new car and job etc), he snapped out of it and started feeling the reality of not only his world but the world in general. With the thought of harm possibly coming to him or his family especially as his father (because he has a deep desire to please his dad and make him proud) he starts carrying a gun just incase it comes to that. When it does...he doesn't hesitate. I can dig it!

Well my avid readers, I'm back. This should get me off notice and hold you guys over until I take my next bitter pill! Mr. ShanahanLand, go update your mess. Enjoy.

6 Comments:

  • At 8:34 AM, Blogger Bill said…

    You are off notice, but stop hating on soccer and stop defending the Sopranos.

    And for God's sake how can you hate Cleveland?

     
  • At 8:39 AM, Blogger 'Don' Cialini said…

    Have you ever been top Cleveland? I have, thats how I can hate it. I hate Soccer like 99.9% of America - Ya Lost. And the Sopranos brought it my friend. No need for bitterness because they didn't get cancelled like Arrested Development.

     
  • At 8:53 AM, Blogger Mark said…

    Great post, until the part where you drone on and on about a stupid TV show.

     
  • At 8:56 AM, Blogger 'Don' Cialini said…

    Maybe I should have substituted the Sopranos bit for a piece on fruity beers and the queers that write about them...

     
  • At 4:10 PM, Blogger Bill said…

    You rail on and on about soccer because it's boring (yet baseball is constant rip-roarin' action). You blindly defend a show that has run the gamut of mediocre-to-shitty for three seasons. You don't like good beer. How are we even friends?

     
  • At 8:17 AM, Blogger 'Don' Cialini said…

    My man, Football is boring. The average play lasts 5 seconds followed by 40 seconds of grab ass, TV timeout, Flag, then a play. Soccer is just terrible. At least baseball requires strategy!

    The Sopranos no doubt had fallen off since Season 4, but 5, 6 and 6.1 were still good. Far better than the mind-numbing shiat you pimp today.

    I do like good beer. Coors Light, Mic Ultra, Bug Light Mmmmmmm.

    Oh, and we're friends because your checks don't bounce.

     

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